In 2007, Daniel Altman began dating his boss, jewelry designer and East Village resident Chris Habana. He worked as Chris’s assistant (and eventually moved in with him) during the two years they were a couple. Watch The Local’s video to hear how the old adage about mixing business with pleasure eventually proved true, and why Dan, 27, decided to keep working with Chris, 37, after their romantic relationship faded.
In 1992, Dr. Gary Chapman, a marriage counselor for more than 30 years, wrote a book called “The 5 Love Languages.” In this perennial Times bestseller, all ways humans show love for one another are divided into five key categories: Words of Affirmation (“Is that a new dress, you look great and I love you”), Quality Time (watching True Blood together), Receiving Gifts (other than just on your birthday), Acts of Service (doing the dishes), and Physical Touch (….). So as a single lady I’ve been thinking a lot about how I show affection and like to receive affection.
Admittedly, I too like girly things like receiving flowers and handholding, but the more I think about it, the more I think Dr. Chapman forgot to include a sixth love language; the mixtape.
Maybe it’s because I grew up in the 90’s when tape recorders were all the rage, and one would spend hours personalizing a cassette case for that special someone. But I can’t think of a better way to communicate one’s love for another person other than through a Stevie Nicks song. Or a Mr. Big Song. Or for those not living in the 80’s, a Bright Eyes song.
Making a good mix is an art form. Getting the flow just right can take hours. But when you hit the right notes, it can set the mood, and score you major points. I’ve never been cool enough to hang out in record stores, I’m more of library dweller, but for this assignment I went to the source. This past Saturday, I parked outside three local record stores and asked East Villagers what songs they would put on their ultimate mixtape for someone they cared about. *
Two years ago, Dave Ahdoot and his childhood friend Ethan Fixell (who together form comedy duo Dave and Ethan) went on a “man date” that was so much fun it got them wondering “why don’t we take girls on something like this?” They put an ad on Craigslist and linked it to a YouTube video asking for submissions for pairs of girls wanting to go on a double dates.
Thousands of responses and more than 200 double dates later, the pair have become dating experts and gained a wealth of knowledge about what to do, and more importantly what not to do on a date. Some of their filmed double dates have been made into a YouTube video series.
The response to the series led to monthly performances at The Peoples Improv Theater, re-enacting some of the dates, singing songs about first date fouls and even conducting spur of the moment dates live on stage. Recognizing that college students need their instruction the most, Dave and Ethan have started touring college campuses across the nation imparting their wisdom into the porous minds of today’s youth. In 2011 alone, they are scheduled to perform at more than 50 colleges and as long as people date, there seems no sign of a slowing demand for this kind of expert advice.
I sat down with Dave Ahdoot, until recently an East Village resident, to get some tips and play some games.
The Local was a journalistic collaboration designed to reflect the richness of the East Village, report on its issues and concerns, give voice to its people and create a space for our neighbors to tell stories about themselves. It was operated by the students and faculty of the Arthur L. Carter Journalism Institute at New York University, in collaboration with The New York Times, which provides supervision to ensure that the blog remains impartial, reporting-based, thorough and rooted in Times standards. Read more »
