Daniel Maurer A 7-Eleven is said to be opening in
the former porn shop next to IHOP.

Back in November, Amber Tamblyn told The Local that she and her fiancée, comedian David Cross, planned to leave the East Village for Brooklyn. Last month, Mr. Cross, who had previously bemoaned the arrival of a Subway on Avenue B, complained to Gothamist about the neighborhood’s new 7-Eleven and IHOP (that was before news broke, today, of another 7-Eleven.) This week, The New Yorker tags along as he makes the big move to – wait for it – Dumbo.

In the Talk of the Town piece, which is available online to subscribers only, the comedian reiterates, “I’m really not one of those whiny, annoying people who complain about any change, but there’s a 7-Eleven and an IHOP in the East Village now. It could be a suburban mall. Also, I was a younger man when I came here, doing younger-man things.” He clarifies: “I’m trying to be classy about saying ‘I don’t go out and get laid anymore.’”

Also, there’s the fact that Mr. Cross’s new place is “ridiculously big,” by his own confession: “I have one couch, but we need nineteen more,” he says of the living room, which boasts a view of Ellis Island.

Sounds like a nice set-up  – and if he ever changes his mind about Subway sandwiches, he has a location right at 122 Water Street. From there, it’s only about a dozen blocks to a 7-Eleven, and about the same short distance to an IHOP.