Jay Sullivan A scene from “Yeast Nation,” part of the month-long Fringe Festival starting this evening.

You’ve already been told about “Jersey Shoresical: A Frickin’ Rock Opera” and “Theater of the Arcade: Five Classic Video Games Adapted for the Stage,” but where the 15th Annual Fringe Festival is concerned, that’s just the start of the kookiness. A few weeks ago, we received a whopping 87 press releases for the festival, which throws its opening party tonight. We combed through them to find lines that alone are worth the price of admission.

Whale Song or: Learning to Live With Mobyphobia: “Only Maya Swan knows why Molly the whale is stranded in the Hudson River. Maya knows Molly has come to deliver a message from her dead father (whose body was found sprawled nude on the back of a killer whale at Sea World). But what is the message?”

Killing John Grisham: “Follows aspiring author Josh’s quest to escape his minimum wage life, derailed by self-doubt, girl problems and loyal friends with violent tendencies. Did we mention the world famous author who steals Josh’s book? That too.”

The Bardy Bunch: The War of the Families Partridge and Brady: “Inspired by ‘The Brady Bunch’ and ‘The Partridge Family’ as well as the dramas of William Shakespeare, writer/producer Stephen Garvey describes the musical as ‘a mash-up of everything Bard, Brady, and Bonaduce.'”

The Flowers of Fantastico: “With superhero nuns, demonic baked goods, annoying ex-boyfriends, and a celesbian wedding that could end the world, don’t miss this bisexual horror-comedy extravaganza!”

Lola-Lola: “An off-kilter love story about an intellectually radiant chimpanzee named Lola and John, a not quite orthodox full professor at a Christian university in the Midwest.”

Kevin Scott Jerry Miller and Will Nunziata in “Dystopia Gardens.”

Jeffrey Dahmer Live: “Combines personal stories and hummable songs as it explores relatable aspects behind the extreme, hurtful actions of the iconic title character. The jailed Dahmer, struggling to understand his path, creates a solo show with the aid of the prison drama club.”

Dystopia Gardens: “Imagine if ‘Logan’s Run’ and ‘Brazil’ had a baby boy, and ‘THX-1138’ and ‘Demolition Man’ had a baby girl, and in ‘1984’ those kids had sex in a pool of funny, well, ‘Dystopia Gardens’ would be their abandoned bastard child.”

Yeast Nation (The Triumph of Life): “Takes the audience back to 3,000,458,000 B.C., when the world’s first salt-eating yeasts float in the brine of the primordial sea. The yeasts’ aging and tyrannical king is unwilling to confront the depletion of their saline food supply.”

Cassanova Was a Woman: “Throw in a famous Spanish star mother, a homophobic sister, and an imaginary naked Fantasy Man, and her dilemma takes a riotous unexpected twist. Leaving the audience pondering: Can you be a free-spirited, sexually flued, pansexual, bisexual, metrosexual, monogamist…and also be Latin?”

Heads: “A strange new comedy about love and leafy greens, is a sketch play in two parts. In ‘Freshfaced,’ can Colin save his relationship despite having a toaster for a head? In part two, ‘Bubble and Squeak,” is Dolores smuggling cabbages in her pants?”